Tuesday, May 4, 2010

So, that didn't go well...

We had our visit with the neurologist yesterday, and to say it didn't go well is an understatement.

I was hesitant to go back to the guy, because when we saw him 2 years ago he didn't seem to listen, and was quite frankly a bit of a jerk. However, my pediatrician really wanted me to go back to see him again because she thought he would be able to see Andy today vs. 2 years ago. She really thought he would get an Asperger's diagnosis.

My first clue that it wasn't going to go well should have been when the doctor got his reflex hammer out, and without warning my SPD kiddo, whacked him on the leg with it. Andy immediately said, "OWWWWW!!!!! What are you doing? That hurts!!!!!" The doctor continued to check his reflexes without explaining himself, and then rolled his eyes at me really dramatically while Andy complained about it hurting.

After 5 minutes, the neuro said it wasn't Asperger's. He said it was ADHD (again). I had letters from Andy's teachers saying they didn't see any ADHD, I had filled out an ADHD questionaire, but he ignored those. He said it's definitely ADHD and he wanted to immediately start Andy on Strattera.

I said no way, absolutely not. I told him I don't see it. He said, "You see it. You just pretend not to."

Seriously? Where are the cameras? Am I being Punked? Am I on Candid Camera?

Then he said again that SPD isn't "real".

I immediately said, "Woah, wait a minute. Just because it isn't in the DSM doesn't mean it isn't real. It's a finalist to make it in the next edition."

He said, "Well, that's debatable. We'll see."

OMG. Is this guy serious?

I said, "There was a time when Autism wasn't in the DSM, does that mean IT wasn't real?"

To which he said, "You know what they are taking out of the DSM? That's right...Asperger's."

So I came back with, "Um, it isn't getting taken out...it's getting moved under the umbrella of autism."

What a jerk! He obviously has never had anyone question him before, much less someone who knows what she's talking about. He got really defensive, really quickly.

It went downhill from there.

I asked him, if it isn't Asperger's, how does he explain the lack of eye contact. He said that Andy is just self absorbed. I asked why Andy replies off topic in conversation, and he said it's because he has ADHD and isn't paying attention to the conversation.

I asked him why Andy has such severe sensory issues, and he said that there's no such thing. It's just anxiety.

He said the meltdowns are because Andy has an inflated sense of selfworth and wants everything to revolve around him, and when it doesn't, he has a fit.

Wow. Seriously? So, let me get this straight...

According to this doctor, my son is a spoiled, self absorbed, manipulative brat? Does that sum it up nicely?

Needless to say, I thanked the doctor for his time, told him I would not be coming back to see him, and left.

I immediately called my pediatrician and talked to her for a long time on the phone. She was really discouraged because, like me, she thinks Andy warrants an Asperger's Diagnosis. She recommended a second opinion.

Now we are waiting to get an appointment with another neurologist here in our area who specializes in Autism and Autism Spectrum disorders. I'll keep you posted.


  1. I am so sorry you had that experience, but good for you for standing up for your son. I have found as a parent it can be very challenging to question a professional. They are the expert...but there is a time and place even the experts are wrong or lack the specific expertise and real life experiences to make an accurate diagnosis. I am so happy to hear you have a supportive pediatrician and are willing to continue to pursue it.

  2. Oh my goodness! This is just too much! What a jerk! You are such a good mommy! Good for you for gettting a second opinion and for doing what you think is best for your child. We are their advocate and cannot settle for anything but the best.

  3. Oh my goodness... I am so sorry you had to deal with such a sucky person. Huge huge hugs!

  4. While I was reading your post all I wanted to do was go to that Dr.s office an give him a piece of my mind! Too bad you can't not pay him. I hope the next Dr. gets... your child !
    Good Luck!

  5. Nothing worse than a Doctor who has NO idea what he/she is talking about.. Sometimes I think "WE ARE" the experts..